In Which I Describe Candy in Some Detail

I don’t like root beer. And I don’t like root beer-flavored items such as Dum-Dums, or those candies that look like tiny barrels.

But I quite enjoy root beer Jelly Belly jelly beans. Why would that be?

On the subject of said jelly beans, the vast majority are a delight to the senses, but some of them taste like death (thanks for my present, Ro!). I’ve taken to dumping tiny piles of them onto my desk and eating them while I work on the mindless backlog of utterly pointless tasks that have accumulated in my world, each more dull and difficult to knock off than the last. I’ll be chewing along, enjoying some watermelon, a little cotton candy, when HOLY GOD WHAT IS IN MY MOUTH. Oh Jesus, it’s licorice, argh! Quick, eat something else to kill it! *chewchewchew*… Blech! Peanut butter was not the thing to follow that up with.

Because while the peanut butter jelly bean might be tolerable alone, eating random jelly beans with no forethought leads to these terrible, painful, vomity chains of taste. Plan ahead, is what I’m saying.

Internet Pet Peeves

"My hot little hands" – as in, "Once I get the Wii in my hot little hands, life will be complete." It’s like watching a cliche be born.

"Frabjous" – as in, "Hello, I am a douchebag. Frabjous!" Seriously, what the hell is this? It appears to mean "fabulous." But in baby talk?

Last Sunday Miscellany

Thoughts I think throughout my day sitting in the coffeeshop doing doc review:

-
There are a lot of ladies with really great hair. Girl in line with
perfectly wavy hair, lady who just walked by outside with messy wavy
hair. Maybe I just think wavy hair looks cool. Hrm.

- So. Many. Hipsters. Everywhere!

- Only the top outlet of the
outlet nearest my table works. I am using the bottom one (though all
morning I had to use a more far-flung outlet). Unfortunately, as the
person sitting at the table nearest the partially-functioning outlet,
it is my sad duty to inform anyone who wanders over with a laptop cord
in hand that the top outlet does not work. I hope they believe me. It
would be a weird thing to make up though.

- I can hear each
drink order as it is called out, because I’m sitting in the front of
the shop. They have a mocha chai that seems to be very popular. I like
mochas, and I like chai, but I think that would make me throw up.

- Oh! A man wanted to use the outlet SO BAD, he went to Brooks, blocks away, and bought a…thing…the things that turn one outlet into many. What are those called? Anyway, good for him, outlets for all!

- I’m glad I can sort of button myself into my sleeping bag coat without having to wear the sleeves. Stupid draft.

- This is an EXCELLENT grilled cheese.

- Some guy at the register is pitching a fit at the register because they are changing the policy on their "frequent buyer" cards in January, and something about his card not being usable anymore or something. I don’t know. But he keeps saying "I don’t mean to be a jerk." But clearly he does mean to be, right? I mean, he has been going on about it loudly for 10 minutes, even though the people working here clearly have no ability to help him or change the policy. They handled with him aplomb, though.

- I am a sucker for cute designs made with latte foam.

Dude, You’re Encroaching on My Decrees

The post title has nothing to do with the content that follows. And I’m not sorry.

Today’s topic: Watching Television is Hard

I have a problem with television – not the problem where I watch too much, because that’s not really a problem and also I can quit anytime. I am having trouble actually watching TV. I have lots of great shows all neatly lined up in my DVR, and I cannot watch any of them. For example, I have five episodes of Battlestar Galactica in there. That’s a great show, and I totally love it! Yet I haven’t watched it, or the season finale of Avatar, or those four episodes of The O.C. What’s up?

I’ll tell you what’s up! TV is hard – I get all invested, and worried, and interested, and intrigued. I don’t just watch TV, I watch TV. I watch TV hard. I think about it, and what each character has going on, and where I think things are headed, and what parts were bad writing, and whether X’s characterization has been consistent, and on and on. And people? I’m so tired.

So instead of watching fabulous television I’m sure to enjoy, I watch easy stuff, like General Hospital, or an episode of Futurama I’ve seen ten times (note: that is not an exaggeration). But the DVR is filling up and I need to get over my block. Any ideas?